Dear Sticky, Sexy, Sad followers and friends This blog has been such an adventure – and I promise it’s not over yet. However, while penning these articles I realize that I want to share my experiences about more than Bumble. So, I’m expanding my writerly, reflexive journey on my new website. Here, I can share…
Quill as Trench Coat: Writing as a Way to Uncover Secrets about Dating, Men & Myself
Mea Culpa about the delay...Happy 2020 tho :); it feels like a good year, a good beginning. I was working on a story for publication last month, trying to get a handle on what to focus on. To help, the editor asked me a few questions about my process and some of the emotional and…
Bumble Basics: Retrospective Reflection from An Anthropologist
I spent five months inside the Bumble hive and write about these torrid experiences from the perspective of an anthropologist who studies sexuality and a woman trying to date. I found the Bumbleverse a tough place to break into in a meaningful way. The preference for messages over meeting was one of the perplexing observations…
Continue reading ➞ Bumble Basics: Retrospective Reflection from An Anthropologist
When The Plane Lands
I just returned from Kasabonika Lake First Nation, an Oji-Cree community located 53 degrees North and 88 degrees West in the province of Ontario. I spent four days there as part of a collaborative research project designed to support youth resilience and foster community engagement. This was my fourth trip to “Kas”, and each one…
Not a hexagon, but a circle – determining the meaning of the spheres in Bumble’s hive.
When I was learning how to use Bumble, I quickly became familiar with the meaning of the little circles that swooped around the many faces of my matches. The 50 shades of swiping are associated with different categories of matches, and they provide hints for how to play this dating game: Yellow means you’ve made…
What’s an empath to do?
It’s been a minute or two since the last blog-MEA CULPA. Life happens and I’ve let this slide down the list of priorities. I’m still working on my Bumble-related adventures, rest assured! But here’s something a little different to whet your appetite in the meantime. The issues of trauma and violence emerge in different places…
The puzzling case of men’s online dating profiles
Wild, wonderful and absolutely bizarre – that’s how my book begins its explanation of the profiles I encountered during my five months on Bumble. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but trying to figure out what my male counterparts’ pictures were portraying was more difficult than locating non-abstract facial features in a Picasso.…
Continue reading ➞ The puzzling case of men’s online dating profiles
Has swiping made dating too spooky for the sentimental?
In a previous blog, I left off with some reflections about how being "ghosted" on Bumble made me feel. It's difficult to apply hard and fast rules to the disappearance of my matches on Bumble: not only because there never seemed to be any pattern in the process, but also because my post-ghosting feelings changed…
Continue reading ➞ Has swiping made dating too spooky for the sentimental?
The Looking Glass: Reflecting on Relationships
I’ve experienced frenzied feelings about men and myself: lust, anger, confusion, little bits of love, resolve, excitement, sadness, wanton desire. I want someone to have the emotional capital and heart to meet me where I’m at. I’m weary of being honoured for my appearance, my work, and sometimes my intellect. These things are easy to…
Continue reading ➞ The Looking Glass: Reflecting on Relationships
In the land of love and honey, there appears to be more ghosts than bees.
Can you imagine in the “good old days,” meeting someone, making plans to get together at a set date and time, and then just not showing up? If that concept seems overly foreign to you, ask a relative in their late twenties or thirties to describe the normative dating rituals of yesteryear. I can almost…
Continue reading ➞ In the land of love and honey, there appears to be more ghosts than bees.